Category: Spiritual Reflections

2010 – a year of change.

Started the year having to terminate a church employee.   One of the hardest things I’ve had to do in my life yet I learned that I have the inner strength to do hard things.

In late June, I resigned the positions I held at our local church.  The church attendance was below 20.  In the fall, attendance went below 15.  By November, the church had voted to close its doors with fewer than 10 in attendance.  The last church service was December 25th.  Unfortunately, I was not able to attend as I had already moved to Minnesota.

The closure of a church is a great loss both to its members and to the community.  Churches want to grow but somehow this church had “grayed” and did not have the energy and/or the time to spend in that endeavor.

Two weeks ago, I attended a church in Minnesota.  When I entered, I was surprised to see 6-7 people studying the Bible.  But the situation appeared similar to the one I had left.  Another “graying” church.  No young people.  I was probably the youngest.

Is it that as churches we get set in our ways and aren’t flexible enough to bend with the culture around us?  Too stiff to reach out because we’re stuck in our knowledge and can’t understand how to reach “differented” people?

I don’t know what God has in store for me yet in our new home state of Minnesota.  I know I have gifts He has given me to share with others and I’m praying He will show me where it’s best for me to use them.

In June, my nephew passed away.  This was the first death in our family since my grandmother died over 20 years ago.  We still don’t know why he died.  He was young and talented and this world has a big loss because he is no longer here.  Later in the year, another nephew and an uncle passed away.  It was a tough year for our family with all these losses.

Our move to Minnesota was another huge change.  We started by looking outside the state of Washington for a job closer to family and found one in Minnesota — land of over 10,000 lakes.  We had approximately one month from when we accepted the job to the actual move to Minnesota, finding a place to live, selling our house and putting everything in storage.  Things moved quickly.  But again, I learned that I was able to rise to the challenge.

It was hard leaving the true friends I had made.  Some people I found to be less than true.  But that’s okay.  Weeding people out of one’s life is one of the processes of life.  Keep the good, and blow the rest into the wind like a dandelion on a summer day.

A new year starts and new challenges lie ahead — starting a business, finding a church to attend, buying a house, meeting new people and keeping in touch with those left behind, convincing the son who stayed in Seattle that Minnesota is a goodly state and perhaps he should join us.  And the first priority — keeping a strong relationship with the Creator of this universe, my Maker and my King.

“Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business and to work with your hands, just as we told you.”  1 Thessalonians 4:11-12

A quiet life is not easy to come by in this world.  With technology changing so quickly the mind can hardly keep up.

And yet, the Bible encourages us to make it our ambition to lead a quiet life.

I have heard of people who have taken “time outs” from their computers, cell phones, televisions and radios.  What do they do with their time?

We have friends who don’t own a television.  They have two healthy and very intelligent children.  The limited time they allow their children to be on the computer — 15 minutes a day — seems like nothing, and yet the children are well-behaved, obedient, and very creative.

Whenever we visit them, we take walks, spend time talking, visit other people, cook — yes, we actually sit at the dinner table together.  The last time we visited them we went canoeing on a very quiet lake with other people who took “time outs.”

It’s not easy to “lead a quiet life” but if one makes it a priority to quiet their brain for awhile, we would have a lot more happy people.

Just saying …

A story in the Bible is highlighted this week in a discussion on negative and positive emotions.  The story is about a young woman by the name of Tamar.

It’s found in 2 Samuel, Chapter 13.

Tamar’s half brother (they have the same father named David) whose name is Amnon in in love with her.  (Later in the story we see that it’s not really love but sexual desire.)

Amnon pretends to be sick and asks their father David if he could send Tamar to help feed him.

King David obliges.  After all, what parent doesn’t want to help their sick child.

When Tamar arrives, Amnon sends all the servants out and asks her to bring the food into his bedroom.  Then Amnon grabs Tamar.  Tamar begs him not to disgrace her but Amnon was stronger than her and he rapes her.

The story then takes an interesting turn.  At first, Amnon states he is in love with Tamar but after he rapes her the Bible says that he “hated her with intense hatred” and he tells her to get out.

Emotions.  The writer asks us to think about what emotions might be in play here.

Amnon was experiencing sexual feelings and did everything he could to get those satisfied – starting with deception.  What he experienced during the actual rape, I’m not sure.  Satisfaction?  Perhaps during the sexual act itself.  It says he experienced hatred towards Tamar afterwards but we don’t know why.  Guilt?  Again, the Bible doesn’t tell us.  Could it be he realized what he did was wrong and some of that hatred is towards himself?  Or he feels hatred towards Tamar because he thinks she provoked him in some way?

Tamar on the other hand probably experienced fear, shame, guilt, pain, betrayal.  Perhaps she’s asking herself “What did I do to deserve this?” or “What could I have done differently?”

The Bible doesn’t tell us that Tamar did anything to entice Amnon.  When grabbed, she said no and yet was raped.  It doesn’t matter what she was wearing or saying or thinking.  No has always meant no.

How does this story end?

We’re told that their father, King David, was furious when he found out.  But he did nothing about it.

Tamar lived “desolately.”

Later, Absalom, Tamar’s brother, gets his revenge and kills Amnon.  Interestingly, the Bible states that King David mourned for Amnon.  But outside of being furious with Amnon about raping Tamar, we’re not told that he spoke to him about it or that there were any consequences to Amnon because of it.

So much sorrow caused by one man who had to have his sexual desires met — by force.

This story makes me sad.  There are no positive emotions in this story.

Deception, rape, revenge.

I’m glad that when we get to heaven, none of these things will exist.

Comments?

Below is a link with comments from a friend comparing an anticipatory celebration in Superbowl 27 with Luke 10:17-20.

Watch the video.  Click on the link in the body of the comments.  This could happen to any of us —

Great job on the comparison William!

Read comments here

Gifts.  Most people like to receive them.  They come in various types — gifts of money, time, clothes, jewelry, etc.

The giver takes joy in watching the gift being opened.    Their mind waits in anticipation to see if the gift will be warmly received or if the gift will just be set aside, never to be looked at again.

The Father in heaven did the same.  He sent us the gift of His Son, Jesus, and watched to see how warmly He would be received.

Is He disappointed?  Some days, yes.  But other days He smiles as He watches His children accept Jesus into their lives.  He watches as their lives are transformed from pain to joy, war to peace, embarassment to pride, hate to love.

The transformation happens quickly or slowly just like opening a gift.  One person rips the wrapping up and pulls the gift out hurriedly.  Another, slowly and painstakingly looks to see where the paper is taped, takes one piece of tape off at a time, removes the paper, folds it and sets it aside, looks at the box and checks for any tape, removes the tape, removes the lid from the box and then removes the gift.

Is there a right way or a wrong way?  No.  Both are right.  And the Giver, God, takes joy in watching the transformation of His children.

Today was Christmas Eve and Christmas Day for us in Minnesota.  Normally we wait for the “usual” time but since we will be in Chicago for those 2 days, we celebrated our small family’s Christmas early.

Christmas Eve finger foods

These are fresh vegetarian avocado egg rolls which also have shredded carrot and cucumbers.

Inari Inari is a Japanese dish that has cooked rice (with vinegar) and includes sliced carrots and cucumbers.  It is held together in a tofu wrap.  Very delicious.

Pineapple, orange slices, pickled herring, green and black olives accompany the mint and almond M&M’s.  This is the first year we’ve tried the new M&M’s.

Smoked salmon, crackers and edam cheese finish off the list of finger foods.

There are many marriage vows.  Some are traditional and some are written by the bride and groom.  One of the ones I recently saw included the words “I will serve you with tenderness and respect.”

At the entrance to the apartment complex where I live, this statue sits almost unnoticed.

When I first saw it, there was no snow.  After Minnesota got hit with a few weekends of snow, I looked at the statue surrounded by snow.

I was reminded how in marriage we need to continue being tender and gentle with one another in spite of the adversities and life changes that we go through.

This is how God’s relationship with us is also.  In Matthew 11:29 Jesus says “Take my yoke upon you and learn of me, for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls.”

Rest in this world of busyness.

In our Father’s love as in our marriages we find rest for our souls.

Most years, we go out and get a live blue Frasier tree for Christmas.

We bring it in and let it dry overnight for a day before putting on the Christmas music and decorating it.

We have received many ornaments throughout the years.  Some are angels, different color balls, snowflakes, birds, etc.

Every year we methodically place the ornaments on the tree remembering the people who gave them to us and when we received it.

This year, our small artificial tree has ornaments that we bought at Walmart and Target.

We had no memories with the ornaments we placed on our tree this year except the new ones we made.

A move to Minnesota.
A new job.
Apartment living.
Close proximity to family.
Snow.
House-hunting.

Yet the memories we have of the ornaments of “old” still remain with us.  Never to be replaced by these ornaments.

Each person who walked through my life has been etched in my mind — their smile, laugh, advice.  Each one as different as each ornament — unique.

It reminds me of a Scripture that says “And even the very hairs of your head are numbered.”  Found in Matthew 10:30 this verse refers us to God who knows everything about us including the number of hairs on our head.

We are never forgotten by Him.

We received a poinsettia plant for Christmas many years ago.  After Christmas, I was vacuuming and put it in the furnace closet to get it out of the way.

Poinsettia